Being Single at Goa... an experience full of life and learning

Goa.
The world knows it for joy, freedom of being, travelling and an absolute carefree attitude!
But ask anyone who has been there for a short or a long trip, he will have a tale of his own to tell, beyond these.
Here is mine.

Seven Single Girls
Six Mocktails(+ One shot of Fenny)
Five Beaches to explore
Four Days
Three I-Phones(Apple I-phones)
Two means of transport(a Wagon-R and a Honda Dio)
One Mission: Go Crrrrraaaazy and DO Crazy!

Just like the abstract that I created with the numbers above, so was this trip to Goa (organised by the Being Single Club)... a total "abstract" and that I believe was the USP of the trip, right from the journey to the destination to every single bit of experience. Some tiny glimpses of how Goa exhilarated us.

First Tale:
This definitely was not our first experience of the trip, but I just can't get over it and had to mention it in the first tale. It is about how we managed our trip inside of Goa(after Kesineni Travels' A/C Bus left us). We were put up in the Mahindra Resort Club in South of Goa, Varca Beach and given that, all the known and recommended beaches were located in the North of Goa, we needed an immediate transport arrangement for ourselves. Considering the budget, feasibility of drivers/riders, fun and adventure all put together, we decided to hire a Car and a Bike and began our journey inside of Goa... straight from the South to the North! To help us guide through the route, we resorted to the GPS/Google Maps on the I-phones of 2 of our dear friends sitting in the car and the bike rider followed the car.
The actual distance for us to be travelled was about 60 kilometers, but thanks to the phone batteries getting conked off one after the other, we lost GPS and the only thing to depend on were Milestones, Landmarks and Traffic Police. We were a little more than skeptical to ask a way out to people on roads(considering trouble that could come in). Due to this frenzy and uncalled for "loss of GPS" we travelled a 40 kilometers extra, digging into new roads, taking lefts and rights(with small misses).
After the exciting drive/ride we reached the Baga Beach on the first day and realised that it was 9 pm already . Now picture this...Seven Girls, all by themselves on a beach(a crowded one though), starving for food and still not sure when to head back to their den, in a semi-decision making mode amidst all this we still managed to take a few group photos(which didn't exhibit any emotions of our mind on our face).
Some of us then enquired at the Britto's Restaurant(which was located on the beach) about how long the beach can let us be and how safe it is to be there. They told us that we can stay over till 5 in the morning, but somehow not everyone was convinced with the fact of staying over.
What worried us more was the night ride back home attributing to no GPS, very scanty public on the roads and how could we forget... all of us Women!!! It was a perfect Catch-22 situation. But the final decision was quickly made and Neetu delared that we were not going to stay at the beach.
The adventure ride began. It started as a joy ride, as we took to the highway and we were filled with confidence to trek our way back, but it was not more than 15 kilometers that we began feeling the thrill with the roads getting narrower and almost every church that we had for our landmark started looking similar; we soon, near Margao realised that we were lost and a quick adrenaline rush defined my state of mind and body, which no water sport or bungee could beat. There were roads trying to mislead us in all its mysteriousness, and in more than one instance we were caught in the middle of no man's land, just the seven of us. We didn't know whether to feel happy about the courage that we had or to feel terrified; all our feelings were mixed(more mixed than a mixed fruit jam).

Haunts and freak out moments:
If you've watched this movie Talaash, you would know what I am going to talk now. There's this place where Kareena Kapoor asks Amir Khan to meet her, a very hidden and untouched kind of beach? So, in our great adventure to search the right road we ended up on a turning near the Benaulim Church which absolutely resembled our filmy haunted location. What freaked us out even more was the on the face reality that we were just a few hundred meters away from running our bike inside the water owing to very low-lighting. We didn't drown and were on our feet real quick. A little later we were also offered help by a few men to show us the directions taxing our minds for refusal even more. When the breeze got better and the feeling of having survived a drown and a few possibly lecherous men, the victorious mind asked for a quick rest from the fatigue and I gave in to a very short(fraction of seconds)nap while riding the bike. Adventure again, I skid near a road divider, just a few inches away from ramming into the divider(Chanting Ram... ensured no Ramming) ;)! Me and Geet were again back on track and this time she made all the efforts to keep me awake by telling stories of all kinds :)

The last thrill was one near the Varca Church cross roads, we lost the road to our resort almost 3 times on the same day, whirl winding at 1 am, freaking our tired minds all the more. After all the excitement, frustration and exhilaration(all in the same order), we reached our stay put with the help of few family cars that were passing by and thanked god for keeping us safe in all the forms that we should.

Learnings and more learnings

So while this happened I learnt so much and I thought I should tell you about my learnings too.

• Women are at their strongest best when not with men.
• When you know that I-phones are so useful, have it charged fully especially when you know that you have to bank on it. Better still have a fully charged spare battery during travels.
• Be a quick decision maker.
• Respect the decision of the leader. Discuss in case of disagreement, but do not waste time.
• When lost, maintain calm. All of us did. It was wonderful to see 7 women quiet and composed, none in the blaming mode.
• Stay together. We all have gut instincts, but stay on the same page. Either all of us land in trouble or none.
• When scared, sing a song. Enjoy the breeze! It works in boosting positive energy.
• All girls must learn to ride a bike.
• When in Goa. Enjoy every bit! :)

Kudos to an amazing bunch at Being Single!

Watch out for the next tale from the same trip with a new set of learnings... until then Practise Travelling!

Love.Peace.Happiness

Niru

Practising Alchemy!

15 जनवरी: आज कोई अखबार नही आया

आज कोई अखबार नही आया
आज कोई बुरी खबर पढने को न मिलेगी
न होगा किसी गुनहगार से आज सामना
न मेरे दिल-ओ-दिमाग को जद्दो-जहद करनी पडेगी
न देखूँगा किसी लाचार माँ-बाप की तस्वीर आज
न पढूँगा कोई खबर जिसमे हो गुण्डा राज
न होगी किसी जंग की बात, न कोई सर कलम होगा
दुनिया तो चल ही रही है, खबरों से मिला गम आज थोडा कम  होगा
न दहशत आज आएगी दिल में किसी दुष्कर्म को पढकर
न नफरत दिल में पनपेगी अपने ही धर्म से लडकर
मिलेगा जो सुकूँ आज, दिल कि खुशफहमि से
धुल जाएगा वो कल ही खबरों कि बेरहमी से
आज कोई अखबार नहीं आया

आज कोई बुरी खबर पढने को न मिलेगी

दिल की नर्म गलियों में, आज कुछ तो बे-खबर कलियाँ खिलेंगी

                                                                      -निरुपमा

Learning from accidents!

In the wake of the brutality towards the 23 year old girl in Delhi on the 16^th of Dec this year, I happen to observe people’s reactions in various social networks, both online and offline and it’s quite a pity to see that more and more people are just echoing incidences, without making much sense. In my observations I saw people talking over and over again about spanners and rods, the victim’s intestines which have been reduced to nothing, how she cannot lead a normal life any more(in case she is brought back to life), some of them even researched about the 6 criminals and what their jobs were. What surprises me is that hardly has anyone till now imagined that this could happen to anyone of us (literally) and spoken/discussed of how we could deal with it first-hand. All of us have raised voices against the government, the police (not that I am anywhere close to favoring them), but none of us have thought of a way out. After the crime has happened, people post and re-post stuff, which is heinous to read...guys, we all know what happened, but do we need to re-iterate so much, that we become numb about it? Do we really think that posting and re-posting such stuff can help the girl in any manner? I don’t think so! Ask me why and I will give you reasons… I have seen people post “this” issue on their walls and soon after that they have either hit a “like” or shared some “hilarious” video… tell me how can you feel sad and happy together?  I have seen people talk about “this” issue, in a party over sips of vodka, while relishing Chicken Manchuria (quite an atmosphere to discuss this)… Did you know that the only food that the girl can right now consume is IV fluids and don’t even ask what her family must be feeling like about food!

So, now you must have got this question in your head, what am I up to? What am I trying to convey by telling you all this? Here I am to the point… These crimes have been happening and they have only progressed over the years; brutality has reached its peak, I can’t make statements on what are the reasons why this is happening, but I sure want to tell you all to wake up to the truth! Shake yourself up to the facts everyone. A Sheila Dikshit says she does not have the courage to see the victim, but she sure does have the courage to stay intact in her throne. When thousands of people joined hands to protest at Vijay Chowk in Delhi, the government and police used water cannons and tear gas to disperse the gathering, none of our “leaders” ever thought that this could be a medium of addressing the country and granting the people solace by their words and making them aware of the proceedings by the judiciary. The DGP Delhi says that they were able to track down 5 of the 6 criminals and they are the “right” criminals (meaning the same people who committed the crime)… tell me who helped the police to identify and nab all these criminals in a timespan as short as 7 days?? We all know that a crime like this with such a high intensity of outrage can impact the government’s position… hence there is high possibility that the criminals are not the same guys as the ones who are nabbed for this crime, but just any other criminals, who were forced to agree that they have committed this crime, as a saving grace to both the police and the government.

While all this analysis has been done, I have very little to conclude. The Dos and Don’ts are very basic and I would request each of you to live by the principles of safety at an individual level and further mobilize them in groups.

Here are some principles of safety that I have could think of while looking at my surroundings in general and situations like these in particular. I have shared some of them with you to make it effective.

·                     Women must start learning self-defense techniques (make it a must for every woman, irrespective of the age), at an individual level. If not intense, at least few of those important shots that can benefit you.

·                     Try to educate at least one child (under the age of 14, both boys and girls inclusive) about child molestation. It could be your son/daughter, niece/nephew, grandchildren, but make sure that they know you well, so that your teachings should not be misinterpreted by their guardians.

·                     Be wary of your surroundings when in situations of being alone (anywhere, be it home or outside). STAY ALERT. That could mean keeping the local police number handy, better still someone close to you in your locality, who you can reach out to in crisis.

·                     Keep a regular check on your child by way of calls, if you leave them alone at home, while you are at work.

·                     Keep asking your children about their teachers and how they behave with them and also be a regular to Parent-teacher meetings.

·                     I am not too sure if this could help, but I read it long time ago that having pepper powder handy in your purse can really help you save yourself against gory crimes.  The pepper powder comes to rescue to throw it in the eyes of the offenders.

·                     And lastly though it does not directly relate to principles of safety, I must remind you that you must vote for the right kind of leaders who can stand by your safety and freedom of living.

I would make an urging request to each of you reading this to discuss the learnings of an accident and not just talk about what happened. I haven’t been able to work normally for the last 4 days as I kept pondering about this accident and wondering, what if I was the victim? If I am able to make sense to even a handful of you, there should be some peace in my mind. Please remember condemning the act is important, but pitying the girl cannot do any good to us or her. Prayers will help her and staying alert and aware of our surroundings will help us. Stay safe!

Love. Peace. Happiness

Nirupama

What are you doing these days Niru???

"Practising Alchemy!" That was the answer I gave when one of my old friends asked me what I have been doing all these days. She frowned and said, "I have heard of people practising law, practising medicine, now what's this new thing practising alchemy?"

Like I was waiting for her to pop this question immediately, I had a grin on my face and told her, "your answer is in your question buddy... Alchemy like law or medicine is the science of philosophy, though it would not be the exact phenomenon as explained in the wikipedia, but it would certainly mean things that relate to education, wisdom, improvement, knowledge, life, peace, de-stressing and all that you can think of which is constructive and helps individuals simplify their lives!"

Through "Practising Alchemy", I intend to re-create the gold that lies within each of us sometimes unexplored, sometimes waiting to get brushed up and shine.

Keep reading and responding, so that we can explore new ways of practising alchemy together each day!

Love.Peace.Happiness
Niru